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Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Love Bugs

During my teenage years I created the term "love bug."
A love bug are those people who: 
(A) are always in a relationship, 
(B) are always in love, or 
(C) both A and B at the same time.  

It is important to note that Love Bugs are not heart breakers nor are they whores/assholes/sluts/etc.. They are basically people on a very, very, very long scavenger hunt for love. This label applies to a majority of my friends. As for me...not so much. I have always been the level-headed one. I am not the type to let my heart make decisions.

Since becoming a single gal I have been asked on many dates. Dating is equivalent to brain surgery - at least to me. I mean, where the heck was I when society learned how to play these odd dating games? As much as I suck at dating, the rules of the game do make sense, and even though I am not very good at the game, I still enjoy playing. Slowly but surely I am gaining skills.

I've learned that dating has a timeline or sequence of sorts.
The sequence goes something like this:
(1) mutual agreement that both people have a nice (fill in the blank) and thus they should get coffee/dinner/brunch/etc.,
(2) getting to know basics about each other, but not too much,
(3) now, this part in the timeline is the really weird part - thus I will call this part "limbo". Limbo is a weird part right before being in a (fill in with some type of label such as exclusive/Sir Batman/"friend"/partner/wifey/babe/etc.),
(4) the last part of dating is entering into some kind of relationship that involves being frequently naked together, feelings, or both.

So I've recently found myself in a head vs. heart dilemma. This dilemma made me: go into deep thought about how to proceed [[and also realize that I suck the most at part (3) of dating]]. After listening to many heart wrenching indie songs I had an epiphany. My head and heart were conflicting because I refused to admit that my feelings and his feeling were not mutual anymore. Being in a non-mutual relationship is probably one of the worst feelings in the world. Continuing to date someone when feelings are not mutual is selfish and self-destructing. You will most likely be hurt and the person dating you will end up feeling like an asshole. Yet many of us still continue.

So, to solve this problem, you must stop. Everyone moves at their own pace and sometimes you need to stop to let the other person catch up with you. Don't be scared or think about the "ifs"- life works in funny ways and I am a true believer that if its meant to be, it will be.

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